Yearning

It's strange but I've been thinking about Honey and Clover these past days. There is this certain scene in the series that kept playing in my head over and over, which was a big bother to me until now. It's that scene when Rika was reminiscing the time she and Harada went to her hometown. For some reason I feel a yearning for someone to do the same thing Harada did to Rika.

For weeks, I've been feeling sad about something (or someone) and I can't really explain why or how I ended up feeling that way. It's annoying that I just want to cry and have someone hug me saying...

I skipped a line in this scene, by the way.

I guess I miss having someone I could cry on and tell all my problems to since I don't open up that often anymore. Earlier, I was listening to a song and suddenly started crying that I had to run to my room so that the maid wouldn't see me. For those few minutes, while the song was playing, I sobbed... Remembering the pain of losing something precious, which only lasted for 3 months because of a foolish thing I did.

Later on, my brother said to me, straight-forwardly "Dude, move on. It's over. You can't expect anything from nothing. I know it's hard and depressing but yeah, at some point, I have to say this straight out 'cause it's been too long." He does have a point that, indeed, it has been too long even Gerard agreed with what he said. Almost 2 years and I'm still not over him, that's why my brother said that straight to my face, even though those words hurt me, he's right. The guy is his best friend after all.

This is what I imagined when my brother said it straight to my face

What I'm feeling, right now, is the same as how Yamada felt when Nomiya was speaking out the truth about what she really wanted to happen between Mayama and Rika. Except, I do not wish for anything bad to happen to him with his future girlfriend. (whoever she may be)